I thank Kuan Yin for coming to help with this session.
Sueyan takes Internal Cleansing Orchid Essence.
Rachel takes Soul Shield Orchid Essence.
Orchid Essence, please do your magic and cleanse what needs to be cleansed. Thank you.
Thank you body, for assisting me in this ascension process. I love you.
Is there something that you see?
No. But there is a tight feeling between the eyebrows (third eye chakra area).
Is it very uncomfortable? What's happening?
something throbbing in your head.
Do you mean there's something inside your head?
mmm... what's happening?
Nothing's really happening there.
Do you mean there's no more sensation?
I guess...
It's ok. Just relax. Take your time.
Like as though I am using my mind a lot. Like I need to concentrate very hard.
Why?
Need to focus in order to get something done. Using my mental strength to make something happen.
And how does that feel?
Feels very hard.
Anything else?
LIke needs so much effort.
was this feeling created more than 5 years ago?
yes.
was it created more than 10 years ago?
Yes.
was it more than 20 years ago?
Yes.
Is it in this lifetime?
Guess not in this lifetime.
It's ok. Just go back there. How do you feel? Is it you feel uncomfortable.
Everything not very clear... the thoughts and sounds are not distinct.
What do they sound like?
Something like... like the experience is not very vivid. But I think it's like being sucked backwards.
Are you alone?
Yes.
Do you know what you look like?
Feels so hard to find the answers. I think there are no people. I'm like a funny looking human. I'm human but I don't have any... my whole body is very smooth, like I'm made of latex. I guess it's like outer space-ish. Sort of feels like I am falling but sinking. I'm travelling downwards.. abit like Alice in Wonderland.
Do you know where you are going?
No. Not going anywhere. There's no destination planned. Mindless orbital.
And how does that feel?
Confused.
Confused about what?
what is supposed to be happening? It's like floating and can see these stars around me... although I'm very near to them. Like shiny orbs.
Can you communicate with these orbs?
they are little tiny planets and the beings that live on these planets are very small. the space has many levels so I actually came from somewhere higher and I'm falling down, down, down, down... passing different levels. So I'm at this level where they are all tiny, tiny small particles living there...
Why did you fall down? What happened before that?
Walked off my planet.
Why?
Our planet was this flat piece of plastic and I didn't know it was possible to just literally walk off the planet. I was just walking, walking, walking until there was nothing in front of me that's why I dropped. Am now helpless because I don't have any powers or anything.
On this planet, why were you walking? Are there others on this planet?
Yes. Our planet is plastic acrylic sheet.
Colour?
It's like grey acrylic. Glossy.
Why were you out walking?
Just decided to go and walk. Most of them are just. There are rocks on the planet that are also made of grey color acrylic. People just sit around the rocks. That's what they do.
How about your rock?
My rock very small. My rock is a small rock. So nobody wants to hang around my rock.
I'm very alone.
And how does that feel?
Kind of sad. But seems like we're not a species to be very emotional. It's very like that's the way it is. The people with smaller rocks can bring their rock to a bigger rock so you can sit together.
Why don't you do that?
Don't feel like. Feel that just because I have a smaller rock, they can't come and find me. Who is to say who is better just because of the size of rock that they have?
Why is my rock so small? The rock just appears there.. like you are there and this rock lands next to you and that's it. The size of your rock is by chance.
Is there anyway to make it bigger?
Kill the one with the bigger rock and you can take theirs. That's not very nice right? The others are happy to join the ones with the big rock. Group of 3 or 4. The one with the big rock never need to move.
So you feel that it's unfair?
Feel that these people are strange and silly. What's the importance of having these rocks? As a form of identification. This is a damn stupid place.
So tell me how did you come to this place? Parents?
No such things as parents. One day I just came into existence and I'm here. So when a new person appears, a rock will appear (as though thrown) and that is your identification.
So do you have to focus or think hard?
I don't seem to be a very intelligent being. Not really have so much thoughts. Not able to have many thoughts. But I already have more thoughts compared to the other. This memory is very strange. What is supposed to be happening here? Because they sit around with each other and don't do anything.
So maybe you are frustrated?
I didn't know it's possible to be a being without much person. What am I supposed to do on this place? This is a test place because it's an unusual planet. So they are trying to experiment. I am a created test subject. Somebody is doing this experiment. They press a button and blip! I appear and I get the rock.
Go back to the point where you dropped off the planet. Did anybody come and get you?
Got fed up, so I walked. Dropped off. I dropped onto another planet.
What is that planet like?
Worse. Got nobody. It's also some plastic sheet.
Tell me how did this existence end?
The people who were conducting the experiment discovered I dropped off the planet. They didn't know what to do and so they deleted me. I was just a test program. I didn't even think it was possible to have a lifetime to just be created through a computer. I'm a program that can be created into various forms. No idea how the mechanics works. Ah. I see. I am actually one of the particles that I floated to... I am one of them. I am the particle and this place I went to with the mini-planet... we are micro-organisms. So the bigger organisms can use us to create something. When they don't want it anymore, you go back to being a little particle.
I guess that it served some purpose to be. As a vehicle to do their experiments.
I release all decisions to think and focus as hard as possible in an attempt to never be used as a micro-organism for the purpose of other people's creation ever again.
I release the need to understand the mechanics of everything that is going on around me.
I release my frustrations at other beings who think, act and behave differently from me.
I release my frustration at beings whom I don't think make sense.
I release to think and focus so hard in fear that I will drop off the face of my planet again... and thus become deleted.
I release my feelings of sadness about being so different from the other beings on my planet.
I release my anger at other beings for treating me so callously.
I release to feel so helpless as a test subject.
I release all guilt and shame for not behaving like the other test subjects.
I release to feel so useless as a small micro-organism that can be manipulated by other beings.
I open myself now to see that even a small micro-organism plays an important role in the evolution of our universe.
I love and accept myself in all forms. So it is.
I acknowledge the part I've played, even as a micro-organism in that lifetime as something important, even if I don't yet know what it is.
Do you want to ask the bigger organisms what was the purpose of the experiments?
Ok. Why did you do this?
It says that micro-organism that you were is an entire race. You were in a higher race and your talent was that you are easily transformed into various things. And you were very willing as a race to do this. Ok. Thank you for telling me this.
Go to another micro-organism like you and talk to it...
my mother and my father.
what do they say?
they say they think that being used by a force that you think is better than you is wrong. They say but this is not true. There is no right or wrong. We are not harmed. Comforting. Reassuring. Trying to explain. Explain our way of our race.
I'm confused. So why does it seem that I will not die? In some form or other, you're being used as an experiment anyway.
I release to be so confused by this experience.
Our race has strong ability to physically manifest intentions.
I release all ideas, beliefs and programming that I must understand the specifics of how those non-physical things happen.
How do you feel?
So nice. This place you don't need to die one. Just zoom! and then you were gone. Seems I spent a long time changing into another thing and another thing. Feels kind of sad that I'm just the matter that manifests what other people want. Feels sad because we were given such a lowly job. Why couldn't I have been the one to press the buttons? Feels sad not to really have your own will. Feels kind of helpless. To be just one tiny particle. The purpose of that lifetime is to help me discover free will. And in a way, all the other particles that were there, they come to be part of this race because they need to learn about free will. And evolve to become something bigger. I see that particles have life too.
I release to feel sad that I am just matter that manifests what other people want.
I release all feelings of sadness from that lifetime about being who I was.
I release all ideas, programs and beliefs that any job is lowly. I open myself to see that it isn't true. That everything has its place. Its purpose. And I open myself now that I was used for my talents. That I signed up for it because I knew I was good at it. I knew I could help. And I forgive myself for taking such a long time to learn the lesson about free will. I release all ideas, thoughts, programs and beliefs that somebody else has a higher or better job than me. I release all programmings to compare myself with other people in an attempt to make myself feel bad. I release to feel so helpless when my job is easy. I release to feel helpless when there is no drama in my life. I release to feel helpless when I'm in a supportive role, and not a leader. I release to feel that a supportive role, doing background work, is not as important or not as good as being the leader. As being the one pressing the buttons. I release all decisions to keep pushing other people's buttons in an attempt to make up for all the times I couldn't push the buttons.
I open myself to serve other people's purpose if that is my talent. I love and acknowledge myself for having talent! I forgive myself for being angry at the people pushing those buttons. I forgive myself for being angry at the people who want me to use my talents.
I release all programs, vows, decisions to lock away my talent because I don't want other people to use me for their purpose. I release that now.
I open myself to see that we can all win.
I open my heart to heal now. In the Universe. So it is.
Talk to your talent.
Say I'm sorry for not cherishing you. I'm sorry for treating you so bad. For locking you up and being afraid to show my talent. I'm sorry that you've been hidden away for so long. Can you forgive me? Says ok. Says it's been a long time. I might have to take some time to trust you.
Ask what can you do? What can I do for you to trust me?
Talk to it often. Use it. Practice it. Must tell it that I want it. Say that I miss it.
I want you talent! I want to show you to the world!
I want to unleash you. I want to take you out of the cupboard.
I want to release you from the chains I've put around you for so long.
I miss you. I miss you talent. I miss you alot.
I've missed you for so so so so long.
And I'm sincere in wanting you to be with me again.
I love you talent.
I'm sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
Please come out and hold my hand.
Walk with me.
And I can polish you again.
So that you will be nice and shiny. And bright.
Will you forgive me for neglecting you, for forgetting about you, and not using you for so long?
It says yes. It's been waiting. Wait until become an old man already.
Don't worry. I will make you shiny and young and happy.
I won't neglect you and forget about you.
Let me comfort you.
Talent is in my hand. I put him in my heart.
Talent want to ask you why did you lock him away?
Because I was scared of being different. What will happen if you're different? scared other people will look at me weirdly. Then I will be even more alone. Will feel very sad because no one will like me. Then I may hurt yourself. I will punish myself. Keep all the sadness and hurt inside.
I release all decisions, programs and beliefs that cause me to keep all my sadness and hurt inside. I open myself to share and release my sadness and hurts to those who love and care about me. I release all decisions, programs and beliefs that cause me to punish myself when I think that no likes me. I forgive myself for punishing myself in the past. I forgive myself for thinking that no one likes me, whether it's true or not. I release all my sadness when I felt in the past, that no one likes me. No one wants to play with me. No one wants me around. Nobody in the world wants me. Feel so lonely. I release all beliefs, ideas and programming that if one person doesn't like me or love me, then everybody doesn't like me or love me.
I release to hide away my talents and cause physical pain in my body in an attempt to punish myself because I think that I am not wanted in this world.
I release my fears about other people looking weirdly at me. I open myself to see that maybe that's just the way they look. Maybe the way they look at me is just a projection of what I think about myself. I am willing to love and accept even more now.
Talent, will you like to live in my heart? Yes.
I release my fear of being different. My fear of looking different. I open myself to see that each and everyone of us is different. Is unique. I was unique even when I was a micro-organism. I don't need to fight it anymore. I don't need to struggle anymore. I am willing to accept all of me now. Including my talent.
After that, Sueyan felt sad so I held her hand to support her as she teared and cried. She basically released to feel sad/lousy that her friends didn't want to talk to her because our parents weren't in the same profession as their parents.
I release to be afraid that if I share my heart with my parents, they will feel sad.
I release all ideas, programming and beliefs that they judge me because of my parents. When I know better, I do better.
Call all the souls involved in this experience here now. Ask them.. why did you do what you did?
They also didn't know any better. They were just kids.
Tell them how you really felt.
I felt really hurt and sad about what you said. That after finding out that our parents don't do the same thing, you don't want to play with me anymore. I think that was very unfair. I felt very sad thinking that you thought I was not as smart as you. I felt sad to have no friends. And because of that, I don't really remember what happened for a chunk of my childhood. Why were you so selfish? Why were you so stupid? Why were you so unkind? Aren't children supposed to be kind? And be nice to each other?
They say it's because of their parents. Their parents normally mix with people who are similar to them, so somehow they also do it.
I release for you to be so locked in to your parents' behaviors, programs and beliefs.
Say I'm angry at you because...
you weren't very nice.
and it's not fair to be unkind to just a small young kid.
you shouldn't have treated me like you are better than me.
I trusted you. And treated you like my good friends. But then you made me so hurt.
Tell them what you want...
I want you to...
feel sorry.
reflect.
know that there were better ways to do it.
know that friendship goes beyond just your parents, where you live, how much money you have and how smart you are, how much the teacher likes you, or what nice schoolbag you have.
know that everyone is good. Don't judge them or treat them as inferior to you.
I think you are very kind and very nice that's why I wanted to be your friends.
I forgive you for the way you treated me. I understand why you did what you did now. I wish I didn't need to be hurt in the process. But I now see it happened for my highest good. And I hope you now also learn how to treat other people nicer.
Tell them how you treat other people nicely.
By smiling. By accepting them. That once I've talked to the person, I will keep doing my best to keep talking to the person and not just stop talking or move away or reject or get angry at the person because of different background and belief. I will do my best to understand their point of view, their circumstance. I will do my best to listen, even if I don't agree. Even if they think differently from me, I try to treat them kindly and do my best. I see them as beautiful no matter whether they are rich or poor, sick, happy, healthy, sad or angry. Because once we form a connection or we are drawn to be acquainted with each other, then I will do my best to make the best out of the moment that we share together. And I hope you too can be kind. And also have more compassion towards other people. Especially those who are different from you.
They say thank you for sharing.
Ok. Have a group hug.
You are very, very loved.
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