We've cleansed the room using white sage spray (from Wisdom Tree). Now, we ask our angels and fairies to come and help bless and secure the space for this releasing session.
Next, we each take an orchid essence.
The releaser takes 'Soul Shield'. The releasee (the one lying down) takes 'Internal Cleansing'.
We also invite a bloodstone and black tourmaline to assist in our process.
We have each taken the essence and spent 1 minute thanking the essence and our body.
"orchid essesnce, please do your magic in my body for my highest good"
"thank you body for your participation in this process. i love you very very much"
Session begins 7:03pm
keep yawning
Why are you so tired?
sleeping, body is warm
tears are flowing down
I hear sounds, horses, footsteps
I am the King and i live in a tent. On top of the tent, there is a bell. It looks like the one we have downstairs but its shiny, light orangey yellow color.
What is significant about the bell?
It's not really a bell, just something you put on top of the tent. It is gold to symbolize the King's tent.
The horses and footsteps are of the people trying to come and kill me.
Why are they trying to kill you?
War, dissent.
What did you do to them?
Murdered their kingfolk. All the family and relatives.
The assassins are coming to kill you?
Yes , but I am sleeping.
There are about 8 of them, they kill the guards. I hear the knife, sword sounds. ssshhhhkk, shhhinnggg. All this time I am still sleeping. Tired. Deep sleep.
Why are you here?
Having a party. Out for pleasure. Just out for hunting. We hunt wolves. There is me and there are some women in the tent with me. We partied and had sex and are very tired, especially because we drank alcohol.
What kind of king are you?
Cruel, harsh, unforgiving, a spendthrift, sinful.
Let's go back to the root of when this was first created.
Little boy in the palace with a pointy thing on the head. Something like that the thai people wear. My mother is calling me and I'm walking towards her. (about 2-3 years old toddler)
I keep hearing OhmNamaShivaya
Shiva is the father who barges into the room and he smacks my mother. He pushes me aside and i fall down and start crying.
I'm very angry. I hate my father for being so cruel and being so unkind to my mother. I hate him for being unkind to me also. I hate him alot.
Is Shiva the king?
I heard the word Vishnu. Lord Vishnu suddenly chiong come in and tries to stop the mayhem, stopping Shiva from continuing to hit his wife. It is very noisy.
I am traumatized. It is very noisy and i don't like it to be so noisy and chaotic. I want to get out of here. I Hate them all. Why are they all so noisy and dramatic? why are they so full of drama?
Hate them alot. Hate them so much.
Because I'm a child and don't know what to do, I walk over there and start hitting my father's leg with my small tiny hands. thinking" let go of my mom, you horrible beastly man, stop punishing my mother, i hate you, i hate you for being my father, i hate you hate you hate you hate you'."
Rachel starts hitting the bed.
How do you want to feel instead?
That there is a solution, that there is a better way, that it is harmonious and peaceful and balanced and respectful and compassionate and kind. I want to have beautiful moments with my mother and father. I want the family to get along. I want them to learn a better way, a more peaceful, harmonious way.
"Father, Mother. Uncle I want you all to stop fighting, I want you to find a better, more peaceful way to resolve your conflicts. Violence just leads to more violence. Violence leads to confusion. Let there be more compassion. I want us to get along and be good and nice to each other. Can we do this?"
They ask me how?
What do you feel like telling them?
I feel like telling them it's about practising connecting your heart and your mind. Spending time reflecting on yourself, taking responsibility for every moment, both when good things happen and bad things happen. Really looking inward at what created this situation. Most important is to spend time alone to be really honest with yourself and ask for help and support when you really need it.
Tell them how hurt you were for what they did.
I felt really hurt by what you did. It was very noisy, my psychic body felt assaulted. I felt very unsafe and worried. Felt stressed and lost and confused. Unsure of how to resolve the situation. I feel like I cannot trust any of you. can't even love all of you. It hurt my heart and my mind. It imprinted on my mind the memory and made it so hard to move past it. Keeps replaying, keeps replaying.
Father it was very unfair to hurt my mother for your anger. I'm sorry for blaming you for my shortcomings. I'm sorry for blaming myself for not knowing what to do and feeling so helpless during that lifetime because I was only a child.
I release to feel so guilty and ashamed to think that it was because of me that caused so much dissonance in the family. I release to blame myself for what happened during that lifetime. I release all that into the universe. I release to take on the responsibility for the way my parents felt. I open my heart to see their actions with compassion. I release all hate and anger toward my father for hitting my mother in that lifetime. I release all that into the universe now.
Pain aching in the left part of the tail bone. I release to over-identify with that experience and pain in my body. I create some exit points where the pain is to let the pain be released easily and comfortably.
I release all anger and hatred towards for my father pushing me and making me fall down, causing me to get hurt. I open myself to let my body heal now. I release all feelings of resentment toward my father, my mother and uncle for making such a ruckus when they fight. (laughs)
I'm thinking, what are people supposed to do when they fight? are they supposed to keep quiet when they fight?
I release to feel so confused about the concept of fighting in the universe. I open myself to see that fighting is an energy rather than specific actions and behaviours. I open myself to see that people can argue physically and agree on another plane or level. I appreciate being given this information at this time.
Father, Mother, Uncle, do you forgive me for feeling those ways towards you?
-Yes child, we forgive you.
I release to feel guilty about wanting the attention of adults and other people. I forgive myself for finding and using all sorts of ways and means to get the attention of my parents because i used to think that was what love was all about. I release all this into the universe now.
I release to be involved in other people's quarrels and arguments. I release all programs, ideas and beliefs that if other people quarrel, then it must be because of me and must be my fault. I release the need to control and manipulate other people, thinking that it will give me even more power.
Father, Mother, Uncle, I give you back your power now and i take back my own power. I ask for you to do your best to keep your own power and not give your power away. and i will do my best to keep my own power, so we may do our best to respect each other no matter what age, what race, what gender, spiritual inclination. so it is.
I release all ideas, beliefs and programming that anger is a inferior feeling. I open myself to let other people feel angry if they feel like it. I release all vows, agreements and ideas to be passive aggressive, in order to avoid verbal or physical abuse or disagreement. I release to feel that being angry is bad. I release all decisions to punish myself whenever i feel angry, thinking that being angry is bad. I release all of that into the universe now. I release to control my anger and hide it, thinking that other people will love me more if i'm happy and nice all the time. I also release all decisions, programming and beliefs to suppress my anger thinking that it will hurt the people around me in unfair ways. I open myself to release my anger in healthy and harmonious ways. I open myself to see that when I express my anger harmoniously, other people will be able to accept it. I release my fear of being angry. I release to hide my emotions when I am angry. I release to hide my emotions to try and manipulate the way other people feel about me. I release to be so angry at the world for not behaving in the way i want them to. I ask for all the things I've released to be released in all parts of the universe and for everyone in this universe. I release all anger at the things i cannot control. I release all anger that I am not God. I release to be so angry at myself when i forget that everything in every moment is always happening for my highest good. I accept now that life doesn't make mistakes, that i'm always given an opportunity to make a new decision to ask for what i prefer and receive first in my mind, then in my heart, what it is that i truly, deeply want for my and everyone's highest good.
I release for things to be so unsure. I release all resentment towards things being unsure in this physical body. I release all resentment that i have not yet learnt how to manifest things immediately in this physical body.
I release to be so angry at my father for his actions. I release to be so angry at male energy for thinking that violence can solve anything. I release all anger towards male energies for using violence against female energies.
Rachel holds the back of her knees, but shall stop our session at one memory. The next memory will be looked at another time.
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